Kerry's StoryHi My name is Bill. I first met Kerry when she was still at school, and we started going out together about a month later. I went out with her for some two years but after that, we stopped going out but remained friends. Kerry was in care, and when she reached eighteen, her foster carers let her stay on. Then she got pregnant and had an abortion. I was disgusted at the time as I could not agree with abortion, but I had to admit that she was in no way capable at the time of raising a child. She left her foster carers shortly afterwards, and started living with a boyfriend. By the time she was 26 she had had a succession of boyfriends, most of who were violent. Then she was expecting again and decided to keep it this time. She came to visit when the baby was two months old, and my mum commented that she was not aware of how delicate babies are. She had dragged on his coat without thinking about his little arms. Other than that, he was well kept and clean, and obviously loved. Next time I saw her she was distraught. The baby had been taken away from her with suspected physical abuse. A number of broken bones. She blamed her boyfriend and her boyfriend blamed her. She was allowed to visit the baby three times a week. I still cared for her and did what I could to help her get her baby back. I stressed how imortant it was to visit regularly. I tried to arrange for mothering classes for her, but there were none. I made her clean up her flat, and get rid of the numerous pets than had overrun the place. In the end, the result was inevitable. The baby was put up for adoption. Neither she nor her boyfriend were prosecuted by the Police. The next time she contacted me, she was sleeping rough in London. She was desperate again. I drove to London and picked her up. Next day I arranged for temporary shelter; some time later she got a flat again. Two years later she was living rough again. She had gone from a beautiful teenager, to a haggered crone at the age of 28. Analysis This is a case where most people might agree that taking the baby away was probably in the child's best interests. But take note. Kerry had been in care for a number of years, and her failure to be a good mother was ultimately down to her poor upbringing. She needed training in child care. There was none available in the time of crisis; but there should have been training when she was much younger She seemed to have an association with violence that might have been dealt with at an earlier age. This case highlights the long term effects of taking a baby away from a mother. I suspect that the trauma suffered by the mother is at least as great as the early death of a child. Kerry's spiral into total despair would seem to confirm this, although other factors might be at play. Pity Kerry. If she still lives, it may be on a street near you. Except where indicated, any part of this site may be freely copied provided only that a link is put back to this site. (http://www.stolenchildhood.homecall.co.uk) |
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